Born to bed. Rock & Roll's most effeminate man, who continues to get laid to the world's hottest women, may be getting older, but he continues to leave a canon of science behind where banging women is of interest. Here, BastardLife's top 5 tips on being Mick.—R.T.
1. Walk tall, preferably with balls as big as Texas, slappin' against your thighs.
2. Get all of them pregnant—without a care in the world.
3. Keep em tall, and preferably Brazilian.
4. Be nice, but aloof about it.
5. Don't count em up—it may freak you out.
Coda:
Walk tall, preferably with balls as big as Texas, slappin' against your thighs.
STDs are scary, condoms aren't. Think.—N.B.
Three masked men (above) masturbate during a Masturbation-marathon in Ishoej, near Copenhagen. The event was inspired by The Center for Sex & Culture in San Francisco, where the group Good Vibrations organized the first Masturbate-a-thon in 1999 and over the years those in attendance could witness such feats as Kitty Kat, a 28-year-old erotic masseuse in pink cat ears, who masturbated with dildos, a vibrating five-fingered glove, and a sex machine for seven hours (a world record); or Norihiro Taneichi and Masanobu Sato, who travelled from Tokyo to the $20 a head marathon, who after 8 hours and 40 minutes and also breaking the world record finally gave up. After all, Taneichi had already won the honor of “farthest distance come to come” by about 10 minutes. Both men seemed exhausted, and cited jet lag and sleepiness as their biggest challenges. But in the end, 20 years of intense training helped Sato pull through he said. The proceeds from the event in Denmark went to the AIDS Foundation and Unification Sex & Society, organizations fighting for sexual well-being and sexual rights.—N.B.
