In a BastardLife poll of 7,129 readers, 41% of you told us that you're in monogamous relationships and refrain from broaching the subject of the open marriage you want for fear it will destroy the marriage.
"Every time I fantasize about how much better an open relationship would be for," Laura from Greenwich said, "I get stuck on how I can't even bring it up. My girlfriend would be completely wrecked by knowing I want that. In fact, I don't think she'd ever trust me again simply knowing I've been fantasizing about it."
"It's such a gay cliché to moan about monogamy," Richard laughed and told us. "I didn't think there was any moral greatness to monogamy, but then I met my partner. I fell so hard for him that being with anyone else never crossed my mind. But several years into it has me wanting to see other men. I'm not some sex fiend, I'm just one of those people who is not disturbed by open relationships; he, however, is. As a result, I've been seeing other men on the side, safely. I don't know if he is doing the same or not, but I sort of wish he were, actually. One of these days I'll find a way to bring it up, just not today."
"I've lost a lot of what seemed like they would be great girlfriends, "David of Miami said," and maybe even wives by laying out there early on that I have no interest in monogamy. The good thing is that it never hurt my chances on a Saturday night with single women who like to boast they could never settle down either. I'm glad I waited though, because I ended up meeting someone who I married because she also wanted an open relationship. We've been together for over 15 years."—N.B.