Neal Boulton's BastardLife

Hard choices. "My husband was deployed two years ago for service in the military overseas. We'd only been married about two years when he left. I know that being faithful to him is not only part of being married, it's part of being patriotic. Which I guess makes me a traitor because I simply have not been able to survive the celibacy. After the first year I was literally clawing at my body it was so aggravated by desire. I didn't need to be held in the night, or comforted, and I didn't need a man around to make me feel safe and secure. I needed sex, lust—I needed wet, sloppy, pounding wreckless sex. Nothing more. Men have mistresses, yet treat their unsuspecting wives with love and respect; I wanted a paramour. I know this makes me a tramp, a cheater, but if it makes me less than patriotic for my country because my husband is fighting overseas then that will just have to be."—Emma, Memphis, TN.

Branded For Life? In BastardLife poll of 9,917 readers 48% of you identified yourselves as "bi now, gay later."

"Look," Susan from Redondo Beach, CA told us, "I'm newly single from my girlfriend of ten years. I had been with men on and off before I committed to a monogamous relationship with her, a monogamy I happily honored for all of those ten years I might add. Now that I'm single again, I have no shame shagging a guy from time to time—though my dream is to find another wondeful woman to settle down with. For some of the lesbians in my community, the fluidity of my sexuality is regarded as some form of Soviet defection. I remain unphased—and very sexually satisfied."

31% of you told us you identified as "gay now, bi by later."

Jason from Phoenix, AZ said, "I am deeply in love with my boyfriend. We've been together monogamously for about six years. I came out nearly twenty years ago as a gay man, mainly because in my small town if a man sleeps with a man, well, you're branded for life: as in gay, and gay forever. In my case though I am as equally attracted to women as I am to men. In my youth, I just assumed that I was gay, given that I had any feelings at all for men. But that all changed after I met women who I loved, and who loved me regardless of my bisexuality. In fact, I have had about as many female sexual partners as I have had male sexual partners. My story is simple: If I am in love with you, and if I am monogamous with you, then, I am with you. Sure, I've tried open relationships, but the jealousy, that thing we are hard-wired with, just gets to me after awhile and it proves too much. When it's all said and done, my boyfriend trusts in my monogamous commitment, and, being the gay man that he is, just tries not to gag when my head turns as a beautiful woman walks by."

A generous number of you echoed what Julia from Nashville, TN told us, "Good lord, if I told my girlfriend about my attraction to men, she'd lose it."—M.W.

Orgasm, Inc., Liz Canner's entertaining and infuriating exposé about the profit-driven pharmaceutical industry's medicalization and commercialization of female sexuality, opens Feb. 11 in limited release and we suggest you find a way to see it. If it's not at a theater near you, look for it on DVD, soon to be available from First Run Features.

Canner became aware of the issue when she was hired to create erotic tapes for use in the testing of a "female Viagra." Through that assignment she discovered that Vivus and other drug companies were pressuring authorities to define women's fluctuations in desire and responsiveness or degrees of pleasure as a new disease called Female Sexual Dysfunction, and seeking FDA approval for drugs to treat it.

With millions in profits at stake, pharmaceutical companies were (and are) racing to get the first orgasm cream FDA-approved and to market. But the highly credible physicians, researchers, psychologists and sex toy purveyors in this movie say there is no such thing as Female Sexual Dysfunction and treatments being promoted by drug makers are not only ineffective, but also can be harmful. Why are we not surprised? More.—H.L.

No Score? A Zoosk online survey of more than 1,000 people found that 73% of women would rather watch the Super Bowl than have sex; men, on the other hand were split down the middle regarding their preferred activity. Jerome D., from Dallas, TX told BastardLife, "If she's cool with just letting me watch the game, I'm cool with that, too. Assuming I'm not too drunk afterwards, sex would be better when the game's over anyway."

Among other findings, the survey's men and woman agreed that the hottest player on the field will be the Steelers' Ryan Clark. But BastardLife reader Thomas B., from Brooklyn, NY offered another reason to tune in: "I don't watch Ryan because he's a Steeler, I watch Ryan because of his hot ass of steel!"

57% of survey takers said they're most excited about the game itself, while 20% are looking forward to the commercials.—M.R.